An update has been long due. I'm more than halfway through my Delhi trip. When I reached here about three months back, I had just faced a huge setback, and had finally admitted to myself that one does not always get what one wants. Soon I was to discover that one could also get more than what one could want for oneself. Happiness took me completely by surprise. 

So the last three months have mostly been spent in a happy trance, with intermittent spots of productivity here and there. I went to Nepal for three weeks to shoot my thesis film, which was quite an achievement. I did a two-week film related course at MCRC, Jamia University, which was interesting. 

I made many personal breakthroughs with both family, and friends. I'm growing old I guess. I have this thing in me which pushes me to be more and more honest with people around me. I'm beginning to care even less and less about pleasing others. I'm beginning to have a better opinion of myself. Basically, life is pretty damn good in NC-land :)

Plan for the next month and a half includes a trip to Bangalore and Kerala; Diwali related festivities (card parties, melas, lights); more fun with Baby T, and family; and maybe some work. 

Will try to blog more often. Hope you guys are doing well. 

Drop me a line so that I know you're still around :)

I'm at an airport. My twelfth time in the last three months. I'm headed home with a heart as heavy as my luggage. In every parting, there is an image of death. I've had way too many partings way too close to each other.

I get attached very easily to places and things, and sometimes to people too. This morning, I said goodbye to the apartment I've called home for two years. When I am back in this city, in 4-5 months, I will find another apartment that I will fall in love with, and then give it up in 6-8 months. 

The last three weeks have been very stressful. I took tough decisions based on a pretense that I know what lies ahead. And I'm feeling very shitty right now.

In love with Croatia...

Hello guys!
Very sorry for vanishing from the blogosphere. I have been in Croatia for exactly six weeks today. It has been a crazy and wonderful experience. I know I should have blogged regularly but I had trouble getting access to the internet. But I think it is better this way because now I will filter out all the silly details and tell you about all the awesomeness of Croatia!

That reminds me, I live with two Americans! Yes, I know, it is tough, but what can I say?! I'm just kidding. I've had a great time with my housemates. We have a two bedroom tiny apartment with a lovely patio and a beautiful view of the old town. I live in Dubrovnik, by the way. Croatia is a huge country, and I am studying in a small city, which is very popular amongst tourists on the Southern coast of Croatia. The southern part is very narrow so Dubrovnik is just a few mountains away from Bosnia. Which brings me to where I am right now - Zagreb.

Zagreb is the capital city of Croatia. It is an hour away by air from Dubrovnik. I arrived here this morning and will go back to Dubrovnik tomorrow night. The purpose of my visit is to get a tourist visa for Bosnia. I am staying at a really cool and strangely decorated hotel very close to the Main Center (sort of like Downtown Zagreb). I walked around all day today - to the Bosnian consulate, the bank, Mcdonald's, movie theatre, Indian resturaunt, and back to the hotel. I'm in love with this city. Dubrovnik is beautiful, but it is the kind of place you go for a month long holiday, if you can afford it. Zagreb is what you go back to after the vacation.

The city is like a minature version of New York city, with trams on the street in stead of the underground subway. Shopping places here got me drooling. I HAVE to shop tomorrow. I was also excited to come here because I love traveling alone, and even though my housemates are awesome (rest of the group can go drown in the Adriatic sea for all I care), I really needed some space. And I got more than I asked for.

The hotel I am at didn't have any single rooms available so they gave me a twin bedroom. I have two beds, two TVs (with English channels!!!!), two bathrooms, and two windows! I have a million photographs by now and it will be impossible to share them all with you. I will go back, edit some and then unpload them.

Until then, feel free to google places I talk about. Like Hotel Ilica (where I am right now) in Zagreb; Korčula (where we attended the special Good Friday procession); Dubrovnik and the charming Old Town; Lokrum (this crazy island where I will go soon); Ston and Moliston (where I had the most expensive and delicious meal till now - shrimp risotto); Mostar and Sarajevo (in Bosnia, where I will hopefully be this weekend), and finally Venice (hopefully next weekend)!!

There is some studying going on along with all of this, and a thesis proposal in the process of being prepared, and a trip back to America (another 3 weeks and 2 days left), a film festival with my film in it :) for which my parents will be present (!!), and finally a trip to India in June.

So until I blog again, adio!

I'm here! In this beautiful part of the world. It's so different and picturesque, I feel like my words will not do it any justice. Will post pics soon...as soon as I start using my camera! 

So yesterday when I arrived, it was really lovely and warm. Today was rainy all day. The apartment is really awesome. I'm sharing it with E and N. Our bathroom looks like a beach! 

I shall not bore you with words that don't even come close to the breathtaking world that this is. The next 10 weeks will be all about war. My project here is most probably about the war that happened here in the 90's, and my thesis is about The People's War in Nepal. I have so much shit to read - books on the history of Dubrovnik (that's the city I'm in), the Croatian War, Maoism, a personal account of the Russian revolution, Naxalism in India - all this while I'm here!

Have to go home now - no internet at home :(

Okay bye.

It’s the end of the world as we know it...

...and I feel fine!

Really, I do. Different, and just fine.

Have been in New York city since the past six days. I love it here. Just LOVE IT! All I want now, more 

than anything else, is to live here. I'd forgotten how I miss city life.

It's 1:33 AM and I have to get up really early to go to the Italian consulate, and then catch my flight to Croatia in the evening.

Blogger is acting funny so I will try to make this brief.

I've been up to all of the following since I got here:

- had LOTS of shrimp - the best being shrimp dumplings, and a shrimp fajita last night

- met Russel Peters and saw him perform in NJ

- watched Caroline with 3D glasses, and three quarters of The Reader

- bought too many books including 2 about Croatia

- saw a man dressed in a leopard costume jump over seven women

- realized that I know the subway as well as any New Yorker

- had a lovely time in Central Park

- obviously this is too much pressure, and I'm blanking out

Anyway, you get the picture. 

I feel like I'm ready to go through a major transformation in the next 3 months.

I have a lot to think about - a lot to learn, and unlearn.

Last night, just before falling asleep on my friend’s couch, I had thoughts that creep up on me from time to time about everything. They sound a lot like my mom. Last night they asked me about why I went through all this trouble of going to Croatia – why couldn’t I just stay where I was like everyone else? A few moments of regret and fear followed all of this, and then I fell asleep. This morning I remembered it like a bad dream. Its funny how I don’t get any of these thoughts while I make my decisions. It’s only later when I’m about to start out that this pinch of negativity appears. This negativity appears later because it is not really me. 

All my decisions, big or small, are instinctive. They may be right or wrong in the end, but I know that I need

to take risks, I need to break the monotony, the pattern, in order to grow.

Anyway, I'm excited and looking forward to a period of reflection and creativity. 

Wish me luck.

The strangest thing happened this morning, apart from the fact that I woke up before 10AM. I woke up with a sprained right ankle. This is strange because I don't remember having a sprained ankle when I slept.

Though my left brain fails to understand this, my right brain does have an explanation. As some of you know already, the past few days of my life have been complex. I was forced to reevaluate my life choices which caused much turbulence in my mind. My fear was that I would translate that turbulence into the lives of others. Last night was the final test. I leaned on Faiz, and he delivered. I passed. Everything was magically back into place. Not the same place. A more evolved place, and that too without a scratch. Or at least that's what I thought, until I woke up this morning.

As a result, I limp around my room, smiling on the inside.

Got my temporary residence visa for Croatia this morning. So I'm really going to live in Croatia for 10 weeks. Can you believe that?