I never knew sunlight would make me so happy - especially the kind that comes to me, giving me warmth when I'm still in bed. It quickly vanishes behind the clouds, and then comes back, this time blocked by a tree. I never knew this land of abundance is deprived of something so essential to human life.
I'm tired of this grey world that I live in. The colors of the billboards are not enough. Why this sudden need for color in my life? Do I smell Holi in the air?
I learnt an important lesson thanks to asshole aki - just need to make sure I don't forget it. It is hard for me to keep my opinions to myself. If I see someone in need of something, I make an extra effort to help as much as I can. I'm not uncontrollably kind-hearted - just that if someone needs advice around me, I feel it to be my obligation to provide it. That's because I wrongly believe that I'm smarter than everyone else, but that's a whole other story. The point is, I should just shut up. There is no need to go around helping people with my ideas, in fact there is no need for me to even share my own thoughts about anything to any one unless I really trust them. Can you see how painful this can be for a Gemini? It is, toughest part being thinking before speaking.
I've always known that I trust too easily, but now I'm beginning to see that that brings about my own loss - not just pain, but a loss in more tangible terms. Loss is unacceptable. Will I change the way I have lived my life all these years because of some assholes? Will I transform myself in order to be more successful?
All this and much more coming up on NCT. Stay tuned.
Friday, March 14, 2008
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6 comments:
Spring is in the corner! All the color you want is about to bloom chica :-)
So, you are Gemini. Hacker is one too. You people are hard to deal with! Just kidding.
Even loss..look at it this way. Maybe you lost a little because you wouldn't go for a bigger gain unless you lost this. Maybe your new idea will end up being awesomely brilliant which you wouldn't even bothered to think of unless this idea was gone...regardless, it sucks to be taken advantage of. I still say give it to him...a piece of your mind that is.
The asshole just called and gave some sorry excuse. I was so fucking understanding and calm! I hate myself. But I think it's better to not screw it up, since I have to deal with him for the next two years. Whatever. Spring. Yes, spring! I wonder what that's like. The extended winter has hypnotised me - I can't remember any other state of being! And, you're right about both things. I'm sitting in my bed waiting for the bigger gain/brilliant idea to hit me :) and Geminis are difficult - but aren't they just awesome?
So you won't be here for our birthday then, zodiac girl?
Of course I will be! Mine is June 10th, when's your's? Why did you think I won't be there???
May 21.. In my limited knowledge of star signs, I thought Gemini was on the April-May side of my cusp. And you said you'd be here June, July, and August, hence not in April/May.
i'm sorry - i knew its may-june - but i assumed u wud be june - bcoz they're the cool ones.
and u'r right - i won't be in delhi for ur bday..and might go off somewhere with family for mine.
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